Robert Christgau: Dean of American Rock Critics

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The Osmonds

  • The Osmonds [MGM, 1971] D
  • Phase III [MGM, 1972] B
  • Greatest Hits [Polydor, 1977] C

Consumer Guide Reviews:

The Osmonds [MGM, 1971]
The most heart-warming thing to happen to the wonderful world of pop music since Georgia Gibbs recorded "Dance with Me, Henry." Mike Curb strikes again. D

Phase III [MGM, 1972]
No, I'm not being perverse. In fact, the first side to this lp--which includes two great singles ("Yo-Yo" and "Down by the Lazy River") and two good white soul-rockers and an acceptable-plus ballad--is such great AM music that I'm tempted to go higher. Unfortunately, the other side is a stinker, from Jesus-rock to studio jollity. One album a year and they might be very good indeed. B

Greatest Hits [Polydor, 1977]
Come on, they weren't so terrible. In a time when AM music was really beginning to deteriorate "Yo-Yo" and "Down by the Lazy River" and even the scandalous "One Bad Apple" rated in the upper third of the radio pleasure zone, and their "young" songs were not devoid of cuteness. But even at their best they did sound forced. And their own contribution to the deterioration of AM radio was considerable. C